Getting Back to Fitness
I feel like I’ve been pretty open with my lack of inspiration to train over the last 10 months or so. One of the problems is that I get bored easily. Aesthetics don’t motivate me enough, I need to enjoy myself.
BUT I would be lying if I told you I don’t care about aesthetics because I do. Over the last few months I’ve been pretty uncomfortable because I’m at the top side of fitting in my clothes. I do not look or feel how I want to– but I’m on my way back around. I’m not stressed about it. As uncomfortable as I am, I also am happy enough with myself and my body to accept where I’m at and what I’ve been through, while working on where I want to be.
I think that’s really one of the keys. When you are happy with where you are at now, you can acknowledge you might need improvement but also aren’t crazy over it.
Another ugly truth is the fitness industry. While I don’t consider myself to be a fitness influencer, I do own a brand where fitness is the center. So, when I look at other women in the space, I tend to feel like I don’t belong. I don’t compete, I’m not trying to win at exercising, I’m not trying to sell tummy tea, I’m not trying to get the most likes, sell the most training programs, get anyone to want to look like me, or halfassedly slap a logo on a tank and sell it to anyone who will buy — but I AM trying to spread a message and build a brand. And the reality of the situation is that sometimes aesthetics speak louder than words.
So I guess you can say I feel a bit of pressure to be fitter, which isn’t necessarily a bad thing, sometimes I think it has kept me hanging on altogether over the last year. And now that I am through with trashing my body with surgery, I’m working to find a healthy and happy balance that works for me.
I recently cut down my training quite a bit. I found that between working as much as I do and feeling like I needed to spend 2 hours in the gym, I was missing out on things that are more important to me. Like making my husband dinner and getting that important QT with him at the end of a long day. Working a lot is a nonnegotiable, but do I really need to spend that much time doing a hardcore training program? Especially, when I am so exhausted at the mere thought of training that long, I skip it sometimes anyway?
And so I have cut down to 30-45 minutes. I’ll do some lifting or a long CrossFit style workout. I’m trying other things like dance classes and kickboxing. I’m focusing on quality, intensity, having fun and efficiency rather than long, arduous programming. I also put a treadmill under my standing desk so I’m not sedentary all day.
I’m not saying I won’t get hardcore again at some point, but I’ve realized that I need to adjust with each season of my life, rather than drive something into the dirt that simply isn’t working. I’m doing what works for ME rather than what others are doing or what others think I should be doing and that feels pretty good.
It’s amazing how when you ask yourself, “Is this working for me?” and the answer is no, you can move on to find something that does work because, forcing things never will.
Hugs & love,
Read the next installment of Self-Love Sunday here.