Body dysmorphia or nah?
I made a post earlier this week about body dysmorphia and wanted to share more about it here. If you didn’t get to read it, here is what it said:
D Y S M O R P H I A
I know that I’m the fittest I’ve been in like a year and a half and yet lately my brain has been like “ew” when I look in the mirror. Considering my body image has been pretty good lately this is pretty weird.
I’m positive it’s because I feel behind in some projects I am working on which makes me feel bad about myself. I have been grinding a lot in the dark and not feeling very “seen.” What’s important is knowing my brain is lying to me, sticking to my plan and trying to find other ways to comfort myself rather than face planting into 97 pizzas or a dumpster full of Cheeze-It Grooves.
But I wanted to share because it’s easy to forget that people on social media have these kinds of days too. So if you feel similar, hang in there girl. We’ve got this.
Most people when they begin to see progress are energized by it and are motivated to keep going. For some reason, I start to see progress and then proceed to fall off a cliff with my training and nutrition. I have done this to myself over and over. I think I’m at that brink right now. That point where I know I am making strides and am settling in to my lifestyle– and I am having to fight the sabotage. Really I haven’t even wanted to fall off and it’s weird. So maybe the dysmorphia is my brain’s sneaky way of trying to take another route to get me to give up.
I think this time it is different. I am different. I have done a LOT of work over the last year and addressed the reasons I self-sabotage. I believe I have actively stepped off the spinning wheel that was my self-fulfilling prophecy. This is my chance to prove that to myself. Right here.
I think a lot of the times we work really hard on ourselves and pat ourselves on the back for it. But to really know we have changed for the better, we will have to face it again. We will be tested. And this time, we have to actively choose to do things differently.
Then we are free.
Have a great Sunday,
Read the next installment of Self-Love Sunday here.